Stained Glass

You are the stained glass window between clear and broken.

Accept it. You’re flawed. You say the wrong thing sometimes. You don’t keep up with the expectations of others—heck, you can’t even keep up with your own expectations! The basics to human survival are shelter, food, and health. Health. Mental and physical. How many of us can say we are 100% healthy mentally and physically for our entire lives? We are made of imperfections. An illusion of perfection, caulking up the crack we made yesterday when we walked into life and made yet another mistake. And another. And another. Until one day we look back and see the smooth glass of our childhood, an unreachable memory.

“I want to go back,” we say. We wish we could just lie in bed and stay there forever because “at least I can’t hurt anyone there.” We stain our glass, trying to carry on and distract from the cracks. Good deeds, charity, acting out “I love you” just a little harder than normal. We think we’re lying to ourselves, trying to prove “I’m not a terrible person” while apologizing and admitting that we are.

But the truth is, we’re not. The phrase, “I’m a terrible person,” is most often better translated as, “I am a person.” Humans are made of free will to rationality. Autonomy doesn’t just mean we are free to make mistakes, but we most likely will. If you’ve made one or ten thousand mistakes recently, welcome to the human condition! Mistakes are written into our fibers—but!

So is love. In many colors, it shines (7 according to the ancient Greeks!). Also is forgiveness. A binding force that is built into everyone, freely, destined also with autonomy. Some may not choose to use it on you, this special caulk, but you can always choose to use it on yourself. You can break and break and break your glass, but know that you’ll never be beyond repair. The older you get, the more beautiful you may become, regardless of mistakes.

Perhaps forgiveness was a promise of perfection…

So, accept it. Accept that you are flawed. But also accept that you are beautiful. You may not be able to achieve uncracked perfection, but you are also not made to sit around in the dust of your failings. Despite our mistakes, we are beautiful.

“Black or white, we’re vivid color
After a while it all runs together
Our stained glass means nothing without light”
~Sight by Sleeping at last