Hello friends,
Right now, I have a cat purring under a blanket between my legs because even though she’s part Maine Coon, built for snowy winters in the north, 71° F is too cold for my 3 year old Ryka.
Update time! I am currently working on Chapter 16/24 on Selenia Ki: Storm Clouds. It’s going to be rough waters from here on out (nothing to do with the fact that this chapter is currently called “Water In the Cave”). Since you guys seem to like snippets, here is part of a recently deleted scene:
“What do you mean you can’t swim? Stop flailing!” Mika’s voice bounced off what remained of dry walls.
“I don’t know! I always asked to go to the dojo instead of the pool!” Esu clung to Mika.
Mika broke away from him and then swam back to his side to help Akiro hold him up.
“Hold still,” Akiro murmured. Esu obeyed.
“Wh-why didn’t we wake up before?” Mika asked, barely hiding a whimper.
I feel like I should impart some teaching or lesson or something after sharing that. Hmm. Notice how it is mostly dialogue but you still know who’s talking and what they are doing. This is a good way to avoid what is known as “Talking Head Syndrome.” The syndrome occurs when you have a dialogue heavy scene and you could pretty much put it in any setting and the scene would still make sense. Where your characters become essentially talking heads floating in who-knows-where-land.
How you work with dialogue and dialogue tags affects this. Using dialogue tags can also help identify who’s talking, but be careful not to overuse or underuse them.
Overusing dialogue tags (she said, he yelled, he murmured, she asked) can lead to either talking head syndrome or just annoying extra words. Mitigate this by ensuring the setting and character actions are clear and interacting/involved with the dialogue, or omit a tag altogether when everything else is clear and grounded. Sometimes, it’s better to just let dialogue float if everything else is doing its job well.
Underusing dialogue tags, however, can lead to not only talking head syndrome (Too much free floating dialogue! Ah!), but also confusing the reader as to who’s saying what.
In writing, as with life, everything requires some balancing skills.
Anyway, that’s not where my troubles are roughing my waters. My problem is that I cut the book in half and the second half is where I gotta rework the pacing entirely and delete a character, and also chapter 13 (why is it always chapter 13?) really kicked my butt. I just finished addressing a potential “Sagging Middle” problem and am now heading toward the home stretch which is going to require so much more work.
The school year is starting, so I’ll be back at my library job! Hope you all have a good August and a fulfilling semester!
Now my legs are numb and my cat is snoring. Help~
N. K. Valek: Author 